NO ONE is Exempt From Bad Behavior
Updated: Nov 10
Racists are good people.
Sexists are good people.
Addicts are good people.
Abusers are good people.
Murders are good people.
IF THIS TRIGGERS YOU, IT WAS MEANT TO.
The point is, we ALL have subconscious programming that HIJACKS GOOD PEOPLE, who end up making HORRIFIC and DEVASTATING decisions.
Multiple presidents owned slaves and later had a change of heart, signing the emancipation proclamation. Although their views still UNDOUBTEDLY contained some racist ideology to the day they passed, they were not monsters and actually ironically ended up playing a role in ending slavery.
Buddha, Confucius, Aristotle, Nietzsche, and SO MANY other people who greatly contributed to our philosophy and teachings today made APPALLING sexist statements - literally supporting the enslavery, rape, and domination of women. Yet, we all appreciate their contributions today and would not wish to live without them.
Countless musicians, writers, artists, and leaders have suffered from various forms of addictions. Because of their addictions, they have inflicted great harm on loved ones, yet, anyone who loves an addict also sees their light side. They are not monsters. They are a complicated mess of light and dark, like all of us.
40% of wives of law enforcement experience domestic violence, yet these same officers also contribute to the rescuing and protection of many other people in need.
Just one example of many, neurosurgeon Dr. Mohammed Shamji abused and murdered his wife, yet he also saved many lives through his career.
The reality is, all of these people were deeply LOVED by someone - or many. They all had good qualities - LOVING qualities. They were not simply MONSTERS.
See, this is how we get caught with our pants down EVERY DAMN TIME.
We keep looking for MONSTERS, when the people who do really TERRIBLE things are the good people right in front of our eyes. They are our friends. Our family members. Our coworkers. Our pastors and clergy. The leaders we admire.
Retana Bramwell was loved by his church members, one of which claimed the church had such a “positive energy” and another claimed the pastor “always makes me laugh every time I attend” - yet, he is now charged with 55 felony counts because of his sexual abuse of many girls within his church.
Thousands of priests were loved and trusted by their parishioners, despite the now horrifying truth of their widespread sexual abuse.
Jeffry Epstien was admired and esteemed by many and sexually victimized countless children for most of his career.
Steven Sueppel was a well liked, wealthy, and prominent member of his Iowa community, yet he killed himself after beating his wife and four children to death.
Most offenders of domestic violence are very loved by their community, friends, and coworkers. Many are very successful in their careers. Most people are shocked or flat out refuse to believe they could be capable of such violence.
Hitler was not seen as a monster during his reign - he was admired by many.
Isn’t it time we ditch the good/bad binary? It is literally COSTING us LIVES and SAFETY. We are willingly and wholeheartedly giving our trust and loyalty to those we deem as “good”. The reality is “good people” do REALLY fucked up things. NO ONE is above racism, sexism, addiction, violence - not you and not me. The second we think otherwise, we are BLIND. Not only are we blind to shadow in other people, but more importantly we become blind to the shadow WITHIN OURSELVES.
Stop looking for damn monsters. Stop telling yourself only “bad people” do fucked up things. Stop telling yourself the last person who hurt you is a monster. Because guess what? If you keep looking out for “monsters” you are going to get really messed up by the next in line you thought was “such a good person”. Lumping people into good/bad categories is blinding you to every humans’ reality - we are all doing life messy, with our own wounds and wounding others as we develop the mastery we are here for. When we see ourselves and fellow humans through rose colored glasses, we block ourselves from any awareness and honesty that could actually heal us. We need to see humanity honestly in order to love authentically.
If this post is provoking to you, please know it is motivated by healing and love. Sometimes, healing and growth is uncomfortable. Much love, WARRIOR GODDESS.